You are often the best judge if your child is struggling. Trust your instincts. If you notice something is different about your child’s behaviour, be curious about it. Look for changes in behaviour, mood or relationships. Keep track of changes for a short period of time (i.e. 2 weeks) and write them down. It is valuable information if you decide to speak with your child's doctor about your concerns.

Perhaps your child doesn’t seem like their usual self. They might seem more withdrawn, moody, or anxious than usual. It can look different for everyone. Mental health challenges and disorders can impact how a person thinks, feels and behaves. There are many different signs and symptoms.

If there is a specific mental health challenge that you are wondering about, visit our challenges and disorders section on our website to learn more.

Some examples of behaviour that might raise concerns:

• sleep problems
• changes in eating patterns (loss of appetite, refuses to eat, eats an unusual amount at a time)
• feeling sad for long periods of time
• mood swings
• anxious or refuses to go to school
• more difficulty at school
• doesn’t want to leave the house

Children may complain about a tummy ache or other physical symptoms. They may cry more often or be easily upset. Children may cling to a parent or sibling and need more attention but not know how to ask for it. It’s important to pay attention to these clues and respond in a kind and gentle way. With older children and youth, you might notice changes in their school work or social relationships (withdrawing from friends and activities). They may push against rules and act out.

If you are concerned about your child, a good first step is to get an assessment by your family doctor or pediatrician. You can also visit your local Child and Youth Mental Health office during their walk-in intake clinics (for ages 18 and younger).  

If your child is having a mental health or substance use crisis and needs immediate help:

• Call 911or go to your local hospital’s emergency room (ER) if you are in need of immediate help. If it is unsafe for you to take your child to the ER, call 911 to assist you. Let the call taker know this is a "child/youth mental health emergency." 
• Call 1-800- SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) anytime if you think your child may be considering suicide; however, this is not in place of calling 911.

These are a few examples of times when you should seek immediate help:

If your child is…

• Thinking about and has a plan of trying to end their life
• Seeing, hearing or feeling things that aren’t real and/or has beliefs that can’t possibly be true
• Having an alcohol or drug overdose, or has taken a dangerous combination of substances (like medications and alcohol) 
• Demonstrating behaviour that is putting them or others at risk of immediate serious harm 

If your child doesn’t need immediate help, you can reach out for support by:

• Connecting with a health care professional (no referral needed):
  • Make an appointment with your family doctor or go to a walk-in clinic
  • Access your local Child and Youth Mental Health (CYMH) intake clinic during their walk-in days and hours (for ages 18 and younger)
  • Check to see if there is a Foundry Centre in your community or get support online offered by Foundry Virtual (for ages 12-24 and their caregivers).
  • Ask about counselling and services offered at your school or community clinic
• Calling a phone line or online chat service that can provide support and suggest where to go for more help.
• You can always contact us at the Kelty Centre1 800 665 1822
  
  keltycentre@cw.bc.ca for help finding services for your child and to talk to parent peer support.

Some families may be surprised to learn there are Child and Youth Mental Health (CYMH) teams in about 100 BC communities. CYMH is run by the BC Government.

CYMH provides a range of mental health assessment and treatment options at no cost for children and youth (ages 18 and younger) and their families. This may include counselling, social work, parenting supports, and psychiatric services.  

You do not need an appointment or referral to use the drop-in intake clinics.

Step 1:

Find your local CYMH office and hours by using the drop down box to locate your community. They are open to new individuals at certain times. Check what their intake clinic hours are for your location. *During COVID-19, please contact your local CYMH office before visiting an intake clinic because services are being offered in-person and virtually/by phone. If you’re not sure which clinic is near you, contact the Kelty Centre1 800 665 1822

keltycentre@cw.bc.ca and we can help.

While all CYMH teams provide services to Indigenous children, youth and their families, they also have a listing of Indigenous CYMH services by area. These organizations work specifically with Indigenous families and can be contacted directly. 

Step 2:

Take your child during the specific drop-in days and hours, with their BC Services Card/CareCard. You will likely be able to see someone that day for an intake interview to see if services would be a good fit for your child. It is important to call the office ahead of time before you go to a clinic, as many of the hours on the website are not current.

• Children 12 and older can go to the drop-in intakes without their parents or guardian, if preferred.
• If you are not sure or it is a challenge to bring your child, or can’t attend on drop-in days, call and ask to speak to an intake worker so they can help you with a plan.
• Call ahead to ask about options for children under 5 years. Some clinics will see children 5 and younger, but in some communities there are other service options for early childhood mental health.  

After the intake interview, you will be provided information about the next steps and what to expect in the process. There is often a waitlist for treatment and support services. It is a good idea to get on the waitlist, because CYMH is a way to get “into the system” so your child can receive services, including other community-based services. Once on the waitlist, if you child continues to do poorly or behaviours increase, you can call the CYMH office regularly to update them. CYMH waitlists are a triage system so if they know that you are in urgent need of services, it can move you up the waitlist.

Featured Resource:

What to Expect from CYMH Services

Mental Health and Wellness Resources and Supports

CYMH Information & Resources Toolkit

Your child’s school may contact you if they see signs that your child may be experiencing mental health challenges or learning difficulties. The school may also point out any concerning behaviour that is disrupting the class.

School teachers might be the first to notice behaviour that needs to be looked into. For example, they may notice if a child:

• is withdrawn from peers
• is not engaged/withdrawn from class work 
• has intense worries or fears that get in the way of daily activities
• has trouble sitting still, listening and staying focused on tasks
• is bored, overwhelmed, or having difficulty learning
• is frustrated or angry 

These symptoms may or may not be showing up at home. It may help to ask questions so you will have a better understanding about what is happening at school. For example, are there particular times when they notice changes in your child’s behaviour?

Step 1: Meet with the teacher

The teacher will usually arrange a meeting with you if your child is having difficulty learning or coping at school. They may suggest connecting you with other school services or recommend assessments. You should ask what services and supports are available to you and your child.

Step 2: Talk with your family doctor

If the concerns are ongoing, make an appointment with your family doctor or pediatrician to discuss the concerns. You can then take this information back to the school and work together to support your child in school. If you don't have a family doctor or pediatrician, you can also visit a walk in clinic to discuss your concerns and ask for a referral on to a pediatrician.

Step 3: Work with the teacher and school support staff to support your child

Stay in contact with the teacher to keep track of your child's behaviour and deal with concerns in the classroom.

If you are concerned about your child’s mental health, a good first step is to meet with your family doctor to talk about any concerns you have. They can then provide a referral to a pediatrician or psychiatrist if they feel it's necessary.

You can also go to an intake clinic offered by Child and Youth Mental Health (CYMH) teams. These walk-in clinics are for ages 18 and younger. They are located in around 100 communities in BC. See the list of intake clinics and their hours. 

Check to see if there is a Foundry Centre in your community (for ages 12-24).

Both of these services are free to families in BC. Just bring your child’s BC Services Card/CareCard with you.

After you are assessed by a doctor or a CYMH team, you may be referred to:

• a more specialized mental health or substance use program or service (e.g. a psychiatrist)
• a service provided by the BC health authority you live in

Unsure which health authority your community is in? 

Sometimes it's difficult to find the counselling your child needs, and it can seem confusing and overwhelming. We hope the following information will make your search easier.

Counselling services can be accessed in two main ways: through the public system or the private system. 

Accessing counselling through the public system

In the public system you might be able to access counselling through, a community mental health team or program, or your child's school. There is usually no cost to you.

For example, you may be able to access free counselling through Child & Youth Mental Health services after an intake interview (for ages 18 and under), or free drop-in counselling at Foundry Centres or Foundry Virtual for young people ages 12-24 and their caregivers. 

Accessing counselling through the private system

Private counselling usually charges a fee. To find a private counsellor or psychologist, you can search these websites for options in your area:

• BC Association of Clinical Counsellors
• BC Psychological Association

Finding the right fit 

It’s important to remember that your child might not “click” with the first counsellor they meet, and that is totally okay.

When your child could benefit from having services but there is a long waitlist, it can be very frustrating. Waiting for mental health or substance use services can be stressful.

During this challenging time, here are a few things you can do:

• Keep in touch with your doctor and the service you have been referred to. Ask them about the supports that are available while you wait, and how to get immediate help if there is an emergency. If you notice a change and your child is feeling worse or having more challenges, let your care provider know. Your child may need to be seen sooner. Also, make sure you have the most up-to-date information about referrals and wait list times. Follow up with your doctor or the service directly. When you know which waitlist you are on, you can call them and ask to be put on a cancellation list. If you can be flexible with timing, you may get in to see them sooner.
• Connect with our parent peer support workers at the Kelty Centre. You can learn more about who the FamilySmart Parent Peer Support workers are at the Kelty Centre, and what they offer. They know what it’s like because they’ve been there too and can help things feel more manageable. They can share experiences, offer suggestions, and help you find resources and supports. You can also check to see if there is FamilySmart parent peer support in your community.
• Learn and connect. Search for information and resources on our Kelty website to learn about your child’s mental health or substance use challenge or diagnosis. You can also connect and learn with other families in the online “In the Know” event series from FamilySmart, with facilitated discussions on various topics. You can also watch "In the Know" videos from their library.
• Continue to explore other options while you wait. Look into other options such as private counselling (usually charge a fee) on the BC Association of Clinical Counsellors website. Ask your school to see what supports they have. Checkout places that offer walk-in counselling and support services. Services may be offered at places in your community such as neighbourhood houses, community centres, and family services. Contact us at the Kelty Centre1 800 665 1822
  
  keltycentre@cw.bc.ca for help finding options in your community.
• Being on a waitlist can be stressful and hard. No matter what mental health issue your child is struggling with, caring for the body and mind can really help. Find practical strategies here to help your family eat well, get enough sleep and physical activity too.
  • Take care of yourself too! As parents, we often put all our energy into making sure that our children are doing ok and forget about ourselves. Give yourself permission to focus on your own self-care when you can. You can try to take advantage of times that you are away from your child to enjoy some deep breaths, a chat with a friend, a walk with your partner, etc. Even 5 minutes can go a long way in helping you feel recharged. When we try to take some time to care for ourselves it can help to recharge us as parents and it can help set an example for our children.

When your child is having a mental health emergency, it's important to get help right away. When a child is unsafe and might hurt themselves or others, the ER is a place to stabilize unsafe behaviours, thoughts and feelings.

It may be very stressful to take your child to the emergency room (ER). But, it can be the best way to keep your child safe.

One important thing to remember is that the ER takes care of all kinds of emergencies where there is a threat to a person's life. Their focus will be on dealing with the immediate concern and safety of your child.

Here are a few tips and things to know about visiting the ER:

In the Emergency Department: 

• You will meet different health care providers. On arrival, a nurse will ask both of you some questions to assess the situation. Your child will be assigned a nurse and later assessed by a doctor. If needed, and if available, a psychiatrist might be included in your child’s care.
• Health care providers may talk to you and your child separately, depending on your child's age. Your child may choose to speak privately with the treatment team and this is okay.
• Be prepared to answer questions. The staff will ask questions about your main concerns and what was happening that caused you to come to the ER. You and your child may find that questions can be uncomfortable and hard to answer. But, it is really important to answer honestly. The ER staff need this information. Don’t hold back on details. Be truthful with the ER staff and let your child react naturally. This will allow the ER staff to get a full picture of the situation so your child can get the help they need.
• Write things down. Sometimes it can be hard to remember all of the important details and communicate them to a nurse or doctor. If possible, write down what is going on ahead of time, or while you wait.
• Expect to wait in the ER. This can be really frustrating when you feel your child needs help now. It can even be tempting to leave. But remember, if you’re worried about your child’s safety, the ER is the best place to be, even if there’s a wait. If your child’s condition changes while waiting, tell the nursing staff. Often there is a private area or room for patients with mental health concerns that is calmer and quiet.
• Bring things with you. Bring more than you think you will need to keep your child occupied and comfortable, if possible. Bring food, water and something for yourself as well. A phone charger is also a good idea, as well as a charger for any device your child may bring. Be prepared to stay for many hours. Also bring your child’s current medications.
• Upon arrival, indigenous families are encouraged to ask if there is an Indigenous Liaison Worker available. Many hospitals have an Indigenous Patient Liaison/Navigator who can advocate for you, and help connect you with cultural supports. For example, learn more about the Indigenous Patient Liaison's at BC Children's Hospital.

When you're leaving the ER:

If you have not spoken with a doctor and don't have enough information, ask to do so. It's okay to ask questions. If you are unsure about the follow-up plan or what happens next, ask ER staff to explain. It is important that you understand what is expected of you, like making appointments, filling prescriptions, and following up with services. Speak up while you are still in the hospital. Don't let staff rush you out the door if you still have questions or don't understand something. It may mean a longer wait for you, but ask to speak to them again if you feel it is needed. To help you manage at home, the ER staff should let you know about or refer you to services for ongoing support in your community, as well as making an appointment with your family doctor.