Separation and divorce affect not just children, but also the parents, step-parents, family caregivers and community. You may think that caring for yourself is not a priority at this time, but it’s important to acknowledge your own feelings and needs, and to get support for yourself. These steps will also support the mental health and well-being of your family. Here are some signs that seeking support might be useful.  
 

Overwhelming emotions. Parents/caregivers often experience many emotions such as sadness, anger, guilt, fear and regret.  It can be difficult and painful to have these feelings while at the same time trying to support your child. Consider talking with supportive friends and family. It may help you process these feelings so that you can show up as best you can in that moment, on that day for your kids who are relying on your strength and well-being.

• If your feelings are making it difficult to cope, it’s important to seek support. Counselling can help you with strategies and emotional support and offer a safe space to express your emotions. Other support options to explore include:
  • online therapy options
  • local support groups
  • community workshops on managing stress and emotional well-being.
     

Your relationship with the other parent/family caregiver is struggling. It can be challenging to work with your co-parent or caregiver to build a new relationship. It’s important to find a way to parent together, while minimizing and keeping your child away from conflict. Try to create a collaborative relationship with one another. But if this doesn’t work, aim for a businesslike relationship with scheduled times to discuss specific points. Work to keep your child’s best interest as a goal. Let your child know it’s okay to love all their parents/caregivers. Avoid blaming or speaking negatively about other parents/caregivers as this can be distressing to your child. Find tips for co-parenting, parallel parenting and more here.

Complex legal processes. Family changes that involve legal processes can be overwhelming. These processes may include divorce, decision-making responsibility and parenting time. Some services can help them go more smoothly, for example, collaborative legal advice or mediation with your child’s best interest in mind.

Changes to finances. Financial changes related to separation can cause stress. Check out these tips from the Justice Education Society to help you move forward financially.