Sports can play an important role in a child’s life, and can be a way for them to learn positive ways to boost their mood, work with others, and move their body. But sports can come with some challenging aspects, like the pressure of performing or winning, which can affect a child's mental health negatively. It’s important in these moments that parents know how to check in and speak with their child about their mental health. Here are a few conversation starters to help you connect with your child,  to make sure they’re maintaining a positive mindset towards their sport:

1. Have regular check-ins about their emotions from the beginning. 
   • What do you worry about during games/competitions? What do you get excited about? 
   • Did you have fun today? This simple question could give you a lot of information. If you notice that answers begin to shift towards a more negative trend (e.g. slow to answer, hesitant to say yes, no response at all), this may call for a deeper conversation.
      
2. Discuss how they work with their teammates and coaches.
   • How do you encourage your teammates? How do you like to be encouraged?
   • What do you like about your coach(es)? 
   • Sports don’t only include your child, but a whole network of people who make events and practices happen. Interacting with different kinds of coaches and teammates also gives an opportunity for your child to expand their perspectives in their sports, but also in mental health.
      
3. Consider ways the sport is affecting them positively and negatively. 
   • What skills did you work on today? What were you hoping to learn?
   • What are some ways you’re making sports and school work? How do you feel about your current routine?
   • What was the hardest part of today’s practice or game? 
   • When you as a parent acknowledge what could be stressing your child out, it opens up a new dialogue. This normalizes talking about mental health regularly. You can even share some strategies of your own about how you tackle stress if your child is open to learning about them.
      
4. Talk through ways about how you as a parent, or how their teammates can support them during games and practices.
   • How do you like to be cheered on during competitions?
   • When talking about sports, there’s a fine line between encouragement and pressure. By asking how athletes are feeling rather than commenting on their performance, it shifts the focus from their self-worth to how they feel
      
5. When they go through a loss or other discouraging experience, try and gently shift the negative thinking.
   • “I know the game didn’t turn out how you were hoping it would. I can see how hard you worked and what a great team player you were. What’s one thing you’re proud of today? Did you have fun?”. By shifting the negative thinking to focus on how your child feels instead of their performance, it can show them that  putting forth your best effort is always a win.

Opening up a new kind of dialogue isn’t always going to be easy. But part of having a child in sports is to help teach sportsmanship inside and outside of the game, which can improve the overall mental health of your child. Sports can be a great experience for a child, and by checking in with them regularly, it can help make their upcoming sports season even better.

Want to learn more? Check out other ways you can support your child in sports.